Saturday 1 September 2012

Only with closed eyes, do we truly see.

WARNING: DRAMATIC BLOG AHEAD!!!

Sorry to sully what was a perfectly ridiculous blog site with something truthful and real, but I had a sudden attack of inspiration.

I watched "Dead Poets Society" tonight. After watching it, it seemed strange to me that we now live in a time where no one is romantic or passionate anymore. I mean, we are, but society doesn't deem that necessary, so we swallow it down and bury it. Some of us work as actors and we get to walk onstage and say "I'm lucky because this is a great outlet", even though all we do is walk onstage and speak someone else's words.  We've come to a point in life where technology and fact dictate, not what we think, but what we say. How many of us speak truthfully to each other or more publicly on Twitter or Facebook? We never let our walls fall, because "people don't want to hear that kind of thing". When I was young, we wrote stories and poems; not to make a career out of it, but because we had things to say and it was a way of saying them. Now? We live a life of solitude, emotionally. People are sad, but never say anything. People are angry, but suppress it. People are scared, but pretend everything is just fine because "people don't want to hear that kind of thing".

I don't know what made me write this.
Maybe it was the movie and it's message. If so; that movie did it's job.
Maybe it's me that's sad or angry or scared and in this moment, I felt like speaking out.
Or maybe this is what we should all be doing, every once in a while. Speaking what we're truly  thinking. It doesn't always have to have a point; it doesn't always have to be profound.
Maybe, sometimes, it's just important to take a moment to remember that we're still Real.

I wrote a poem. This I WOULD blame on the movie. It's terrible, I'm sure. I know nothing about what makes a poem. I tried to take a thought and make it sound grand. That is probably a major DON'T when writing poetry - I really couldn't tell you. All I know is, I sat at my computer for about five minutes and just wrote what came into my head. I don't even know if it's important whether or not anyone likes it. I didn't feel stupid writing it, and yet I feel stupid posting it. I suppose that makes my point for me. If I could write it, why wouldn't I want people to read it? Surely it expresses me as a person, and why is that a bad thing? Oh well. I'll leave it here for you to read, or not.

If you managed to read this far, what's another few lines, eh? And if you DID read this far, thank you.



As I sit and try to decipher
All the puzzles Life has me try,
I find myself sinking in sands of fear
to the place where He would have me die.

For the harder I fight this army of fears
With both shield and sword far from my reach,
It becomes clear this battle cannot be won
While aid from mortal hopes, my dreams beseech.

And so I stop my futile struggles
And allow mine enemies to engulf my soul,
Safe in the knowledge that their blows harm not
The hopes and dreams that keep me whole.

My strength it seems lies deeper within
Than simply this muscled cage named Me,
My sword is fantasy, my shield; my dreams
For only with closed eyes, do we truly see.


- Niall Sheehy

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Niall, this is beautiful. Don't be ashamed.

Lau Rodriguez said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lau Rodriguez said...

Thank you for sharing this. Some of us do want to hear that kind of thing... maybe because we need to know we're not the only ones who object to this façade we're supposed to keep up.
I think it's sad that things that were supposed to help bring us all together, like the internet and social media, have actually succeeded in making us all quite lonely in the end.

Never feel stupid. I think it takes a lot of courage to write (and post) what you just did. We are who we are and we really shouldn't be pretending we're someone else.

Hope you get over this rough patch soon and remember that we all may reach a point when we feel we cannot defeat our enemies, but we must meet them in battle nonetheless.

And yes, I've totally quoted Theoden there, he's my go-to guy whenever I feel defeated.

- Laura.

lauraa100 said...

It has brought tears to my eyes Niall it's so truthful and moving.You are right we do keep things hidden,i lost my daughter Jemma aged 17 6 years ago and i use twitter to keep her alive.She was short of oxygen at birth hospital's fault and was severly handicapped but despite her disabilities she was very clever,but had no speech and learnt to use a voice communicator like Stephen Hawkins use it took her years to learn as she had to use her head to activate it,see what you have done Niall you have got me to talk about her and not lock it away.You have been feeling run down lately and with your sore throat it's making you feel worse.Niall i will soon come and see you up on the stage again and am so looking forward to it.Going to sound like your mum now but eat well and take care of yourself.Julie x

PKP said...

Wow, you're right. That poem IS terrible. But not worthless. Anything worth saying is worth working on for more than 10 minutes to say it better. All the best poets and songwriters started out as bad ones, too. Plus you're Irish so you have a headstart on the rest of us.*

As for the rest, you're 31 now, right? Congratuations, you're ready to drop the pretensions of youth, woohoo! Yup, fuck all that "oh, I'm fine, everything's fine, really, it's okay" bullshit. It's very freeing, sometimes amusing and occasionally terrifying. For an actor, however, it's also a goldmine -- dig it, refine it, sell it. Go for it, kiddo.

*Or that could be alcoholism, hard to tell.

Anonymous said...

Beautifully written. Loved the poem.